she peered up at me, from beside my own heart’s flame, treading softly brought me home, no longer the same
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home of the Wild
The arroyo hondo made my journey home quite literal on my most recent wander. i came to listen, and She spoke. Oh, She spoke.
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trust an arroyo
As i continue to discern my steps in my physical and spiritual desert wandering, soul/soles to the soil, i long to trust the natural ebb and flow, mysterious movement of the arroyos. To be gracious with myself when things run a little dry and welcome the storm waters even when they cause upheaval for they are the source of new life.
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What is eco-ministry?
What is eco-ministry? What does an eco-minister do? These are questions i am often asked when i share my passion and vocational call. Eco-ministers strive to understand not only Earth’s ecology but also our inner/interpersonal ecology, the interdependent relationships with fellow species, and the dynamic natural processes of Earth Herself.
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Dominion? She laughs…
Only in this state of fear do i relinquish any perceived notion of control and fully submit to the awesome power before me. i know we humans have it all wrong. Dominion was never true.
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blue mud overflows
In this time of endless ecological desecration, devastation caused by the pandemic, pervasive systemic racism revealed (though always here and deeply entrenched in every facet of life) through recorded murder… it is hard to imagine beyond any of this. It is all too easy to fall into the seemingly comfortable group that says, “Nothing will ever change…”
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a story, tracing an imbalanced past
Like the Ips Bark Beetle, we humans, too, are a crucial species in helping to maintain and care for Earth’s ingenious ecosystems. But instead we continue to carve into an already battered land (battered by us), blasting away whole Mountains, drilling and pounding and robbing and repeatedly raping the Earth of all Her resources.
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to my father who taught me to wonder wildly
my dad had taught me to be curious in the presence of wildlife, and also to be understanding of each Being’s own story. he taught me that the wild does not exist for the sake of my companionship and joy, but for the beauty and sake of their own Being.
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She strives on
Ignited by the endless ecological destruction and rape of the Earth, by the injustices revealed in our continuing pandemic, by the absolute disregard for Life in the attempts to return to “normal,” by the blatant attacks on our Indigenous brothers and sisters by rolling back protections of their sacred lands in the name of greed and profit, by the murders of Rayshard Brooks, George Floyd, Breonna Taylor… and the continued justifications by those who are willfully blind to the sin, the evil of racism in this country… i am enraged, i am on fire. And yet, as the fleeting, fiery desert blooms teach me, to be on fire is not enough to sustain this awakening to Life that has ignited the whole Earth community.
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resonating reverence
When we enter this state of reverence, wonder, and awe, something, a mystery perhaps, lures our hearts to open. It tugs at us from within, arousing us to live in love and wisdom for that which opened our hearts.
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enlivened by the fragrance of sun-kissed desert dust
Returning home to the arroyo hondo, the deep stream, the place where i began to fall in love with the high desert, i feel suffocated. My face is covered with a mask, as is the way these days. But the suffocation goes deeper for i feel it in my bones, my soul. The pandemic has brought with it a cloud of uncertainty that enshrouds us all.
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Life’s inner magic
As i grow in the land of enchantment, i am learning from plant-Beings what i need. i have learned that to reawaken, flare forth, and dance again with the magic of the earth requires a journey to the deep, an entering of that dark, womb-y abyss and staying for a while as my roots take hold.
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to my mother who taught me to awe at Mountains
Awe-ing is how she responds to all Mother Earth’s wonders. i have learned this from her. i have learned to listen for the voices the Earth speaks and respond to them like old friends.
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She unearths the Wild i long to know
We all have experienced a loss of normal, and with that, an invitation (almost an urging) to unearth new ways of being in our world. Do we have the courage to wander into our own deserts to find what makes us truly human, wholly interconnected with Divine, with Wisdom, with Wild?
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what if we are Earth
On this 50th Anniversary and Celebration of Mother Earth, let us all root ourselves in the wonder of our origin, our common home, our life dependence. May we be transformed by Her arising in our souls and clinging to our soles. May we become beings who act for the flourishing of the Whole.
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the tender touch of soul-sole with soil
On this day of resurrection, whether a physical-individual-bodily one, or the resurrection of a movement grounded in love, there is one thing I now know to be certain. It was the dirt that first embraced those steps of resurrection. It is that which grounds us and gives us strength in our own death, decomposition, and birthing processes.
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a chorus of elation
The Beings of the desert have taught me to be thankful for water when it comes. This parched earth knows what it is to wait and long for water, living in uncertainty if it will ever come. So when water does come, even in the form of heavy snow, amid a cold and dark season, a song of elation erupts from the earth because the coming of water means the coming of life.
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these little spirals
Living into the lesson emerging from the wisdom of these seeds, I will honor this time of darkness, knowing that as the darkness grows, something in my being is taking root.
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remembering as the darkness grows
As Earth dresses Her Northern Self in darkness, I remember those wise Beings who have, like the leaves, fallen and returned to the dust of the Earth.
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mystifying endless sky and desert expanse
What is it about these seemingly desolate places that draw us to them? Is it because any notion we thought we had of ourselves, life, the Source, the Mystery is apophatically wiped away when confronted with this empty expanse?
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when nature was known divine manifestation
The sages who compiled the wisdom literature of the Hebrew Bible and the prophets who lived in the desert wilderness knew how to discern the Living Wisdom from the natural world around them. Looking to nature to discern how we must live with one another in a way that reflects our Source is an ancient way of deep re-membering. Re-membering that Wild from which we emerged.
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hush, can you hear Her?
Resting my hand on my now silent Friend, I feel swept up in the untamable seething anger breathing through the needles of these trees, and I have a vision of Woman Wisdom standing atop the hill’s crest unleashing Her cries.
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a desert creek says
Wandering alongside my friend, creek, winding through the red rocked canyon, I feel rushed and distracted from a longing to be there, wherever there is. But my friend is not into rushing. Slowly creek meanders curving back and forth crossing the path designed for my human meandering abilities, which causes me to slow down and take the time to marvel at her miraculous presence in a land as dry as dust.
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soils soles souls connect
This desert land and I are getting to know each other. The arroyos know they can trick me, but I am beginning to learn their tricks.
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wildly courageous
There is something special about the plants that grow here that draws me into their song. Maybe it is their resilience. Or maybe, it is their rootedness.
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thank Her for wonder
Wonder-ing and awe-ing keep us grounded. I could breathe again, resting in the wonder evoked by the New Mexico sky. Even though being new and in transition can be exhausting, I need to remind myself to awe and wonder. Wonder-ing and awe-ing keep me grounded so my roots can start doing what they need to do.
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change is coming now
Change is coming, and our home will look vastly different than it does now in years to come. I admit I am not hopeful. However, in lamentation, I find the courage to act in a way that does not try to recover what has always been but seeks systemic transformation.
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eco in the golden desert
As I acclimate myself to the golden high-desert of northern New Mexico, I am discovering that eco-anything is anything but green.
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remembering Wild
In this “incorrect” and “epic-less” account of my initiation rests the reality of the wild. Jarring, awkward, wet, messy, complete with sounds emanating from deep within, ones you’d never imagine you’d release. “Welcome back to the wild,” the Earth said to me. And I was home.
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